If you didn’t already know, I once attended one of the most liberal educational establishments in the US. The Evergreen State College is also fondly remembered by famous alumni like Michael Richards and Matt Groening. When I think of the four years I spent at Evergreen, my college experience was more than complete. Like Chef once said, “There’s a time and place for everything, and it’s called college.”
Recently I was reminded that I had this other college experience that happened in 1999. In a corn infested, back country in the middle of Pennsylvania, I spent my freshman year at Shippensburg University, a place where people wear shirts like this. My Shippensburg year was in stark contrast to Evergreen. Imagine drawl lectures and a severe lack of interesting and engaging clubs. Well, Shippensburg had clubs. Is this your idea of a cool club?
I recently had the opportunity to hang out with an old Shippensburg buddy. Austin and I were most known for fanatically watching Sifl and Ollie and wasting all our money on the college’s pin ball machine, which was, by the way, X-Files pinball madness in all it’s X-files glory!!! I’m still psyched about this pin ball machine.
So, back in 1999, Austin claims that I went on a road trip with him to West Virginia, and apparently we stopped in some other states. These “other states” were probably as exciting as West Virginia, hence the fact that I’ve completely forgotten about this road trip. And then Austin made the comment, “Yeah, you and I, we hung out, like, five times a week in Shippensburg.”
That sounded fair enough to me. I don’t actually recall much of what I’d done in Shippensburg. I wasn’t partying like it was 1999. It WAS 1999!
A week later I was talking to my sister, Meghan, who also attended Shippensburg University the same year I did. When I broke the news about Austin and our five times a week friendship, Meghan responded, “No way, dude. We hung out five times a week in Shippensburg.”
I started getting a little confused. Last I remembered, there were less than 10 days in the week, and I can’t recall hanging out with Austin and Meghan at the same time.
I decided to consult my other Shippensburg friend, Amy. Amy and I used to say things like, “We party like rock stars!” And for one summer, we actually did on our two week tour with the band Phish Yeah, I used to be a groupie.
Anyway, I told Amy what Austin and Meghan said about hanging out so much. I’m sure you’ll never guess her reply. “Yeah right!” said Amy. “Jenny, WE hung out five times a week!”
So I must have been partying like it was 1999. The odd thing is that I remember playing tetris in my dorm room every night. So much so that I’d see tetris shapes floating down the backs of my eyelids while trying to go to sleep. And I also recall playing a LOT of Super Mario Bro. 3 with the girls down the hall. Also, in 1999, instant messaging was just beginning, and I remember doing that at least “five nights a week.”
In the end, I feel a need to plea with the world at large (since my memory sucks):
If you knew me in 1999 and claim to have hung out “five nights a week”, please contact me and help restore my sanity, or otherwise destroy it completely.
Thank you!
§Commentary